We don't bite…unless you're into that sort of thing

Kwendo

The New Guy

Hi, im the new guy, im unlike most of the other people on this blog because you see what I chose to do with my life is sleep through out most of my education but that’s not my fault it’s my mothers cause I clearly remember telling her as a child that I want to stay home and play with toys but ofcourse she didn’t listen to me…apparently “mother knows best” well screw that saying and whoever made it because I have spent almost my whole life studying and some 16 year old gay ass kid from canada who sings…..SINGS!!!! is out there earning probably more money than I ever will and he didn’t need education actually he just looks like an idiot, But anyway, most of my grammar is acquired from watching cartoons and that is why I suck so much at Swahili…so I am clearly not at fault there, it’s the world. Another thing about me is that im scared of gay people….and no, don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate gay people,…I fear them. Why? Ill tell u why. Lion King. I know ure all wondering how lion king is responsible 4 my homophobia but let me explain. Imagine a six year old watching a cartoon with this story line
Big ass masculine lion named Mufasa, has the whole “Roar…..im a manly lion” thing going on for him….and how does it end for him?….he was killed by cows, COWS!!! Okay maybe not cows but as a child I believed them to be cows. Then Simba comes along u know kinda scrawny has not broken his voice and sings about everything, then when you think this lion cant get gayer like ten hyenas attack him and he beats the SHIT out of them, and that’s not all, after the whole brutal incident…..HE SINGS ABOUT IT!!!!! Well I dnt knw what you people got as the moral of that cartoon but what I learnt was…don’t mess with gay people.
Im totally against languagism. Yeah, most of you might be blind to it but its out there and I came to find this out like a month ago as I joined my IAT class, as I said earlier I suck at swa, and on my first day at IAT I came to discover everyone except this one guy who sits beside me talks swa, but I was like….. hey, that’s not a problem you know we are all Kenyan we are all cool we are all thugs..you know, but the minute I turned to my deskmate and went like “Dude, u have a pencil?” the whole class turned and stared at me in disbelief and ryt there I knew if I do not neutralize the situation ill b the class reject so I completed the sentence with a “Jo” then they all figured im cool and continued with what they were doing. Hence I am now knwn as the quiet guy in class and the other English speaking guy is the class reject…I might not be suffering from the effects of languagism but im speaking on the behalf ot the other guy(lets call him billy coz I dnt knw his name as I am not allowed to speak to him) Languagism must be stoped!
Last thing that should be known. I voted for this blog to be named Kevin and friends for the sake of humour